truth

i must say that i really think it's easier to see the everyday ups and downs when you're alone. there is no need to editorialize or translate or watch your temper and tongue... the reaction can come and pass, and then you're just standing there with this moment in your past and no ones expression to mark it by.

heartless it may be, but truthfully so.

some days it's hard to believe. why should i have faith when doubt comes so easily... slips from my tongue with silken words... deceitful only in their pretense of strength. but these threads cannot be woven to cover the falls and the tries to climb up again. i'm trying to stop comparing, to remember that different is good and i need not be skinny but then i just want to be someone more beautiful, so maybe i'd believe that i'm worth you.

or maybe not.
i think i'm lost... i think i forgot to look down while i ran and instead, only tripped and tore skin from my knees.
i think i've forgotten where i came from, and i think the rain is making it hard to see.
i think that i'm wishing that lonely only felt so, and that i could pretend i don't need you to stand.
but truthfully, i must wander and run far from home but without you, i'd forget who i am.